Opinions Needed: Business Plan

Discussion in 'Off-Topic' started by Jake, Dec 9, 2010.

  1. Jake

    Jake Active Member

    First off this is complete facetiousness on my part. This is the result of 2+months of frustrations with upper management/ownership but everything i am about to say is 100% accurate.

    ok, let's assume you have copious amounts of cash and I, an entrepreneur came to you looking for an investor in a bowling alley/restaurant (new eatertainment concept, think dave and busters, andretti's, US play) i wanted to open. I need ~$5million+ to build it from scratch, plus loans to get me through the first couple of months (payroll, power, water, gas, fire, operating systems maintenance fees, etc). here, in no particular order is what i plan to do:

    1. first, the entire establishment will have a 'sports' theme. in fact, the name of the restaurant will have 'sports' in the name.

    2. i have super high moral standards (essentially a bible beater) so NO ALCOHOL will EVER be seen here.

    3. I'm gonna charge ~twice what it costs anywhere else to bowl, because the next closest bowling alley is over 50miles away in any direction.

    4. I'm gonna hire nothing but high schoolers to run the bowling alley side

    5. I'm gonna hire a GM for the restaurant side, who has NEVER set foot (worked) in a restaurant his entire life, but wait, he has a masters in sports recreation and did open a restaurant straight out of college, which he drove into the ground TWICE and now owes probably ~$1million on.

    6. I'm then going to hire absolutely no one with experience in the kitchen other than the head chef. and NO ONE with serving experience to work the floor.

    7. oh, im going to have 4 people on salary in the restaurant alone, don't forget about the bowling alley.

    8. I'm also going to refuse to use any sort of computer/POS system that remotely works with a restaurant business, we can just make the bowling alley POS work.

    9. in order to get some organization for the restaurant, i'm going to hire 2 FINE DINING consultants from OHIO to pull random shit out of their ass for 2 weeks for $25,000 plus all their travel expenses. none of their ideas, will we actually keep however.

    10. even though i have a bowling alley and there is no bowling pro shop within 50miles i'm not going to put one in, at least not immediately.

    11. this is the best idea yet: when we have parties we're not going to charge the $25-$60/head we CAN charge (since we're the only party place in that same 50 miles), instead i think $4-$18/head sounds good. not just for FOOD, but also unlimited BOWLING, LASER TAG, MINIGOLF, and (non-redemption) ARCADE.

    12. even though they are in the bowling alley 4 NIGHTS A WEEK, i'm not going to concede anything to the bowling league members. ESPECIALLY ALCOHOL.

    13. when my employees WITH experience give me SOUND advice, i'll selectively listen.

    14. when my customers complain about shitty food and shitty service, i won't make menu changes or get experienced people in the kitchen. i'll take the advice of my ugly front of house manager and keep the shitty servers around, and get rid of a couple decent ones/give them less shifts.

    15. i don't want the restaurant to be seen as a restaurant inside a bowling alley, instead i want it to be seen as an awesome sports grille (with no alcohol) that just happens to be located there and have bowling as a bonus. BUT, i'm not gonna spend a dime on marketing the restaurant till ~2months after the alley is open, and no one knows its there, and the ones who do, say it sucks.

    Ok guys, there it is. I know i'm forgetting some other awesome features, but thats the main jist of it. How's that sound? Who wants to be the lucky SOB to give me $5million+?



    btw, before anyone says well you're gonna get fired. i kinda already did, but basically was given the opportunity to decide if i want to come back with a better attitude. sorry, not happening. I've been in the restaurant business (successful, well oiled chain restaurants) for 11yrs, i know my shit. and i jumped at the chance to work at the newest and greatest thing in town. well i gotta be honest, its pretty fucking hard to be the greatest thing in ANY college town without ALCOHOL. anyways, i'll be formally quitting tomorrow (have another job lined up).

    anyways, its just BAFFLED THE FUCK out of me for the last couple of months and then we got a 75 on our health inspection (brand new place), that was the last straw. I'm out. opinions?
     
  2. SonicBoom

    SonicBoom Active Member

    Sounds like your making the right choice...
     
  3. yerrow

    yerrow Active Member

    now go have a beer
     
  4. Jake

    Jake Active Member

    yeah i think i've decided to essentially just reword this as a 'grievances' letter and email it to the GM tonight. basically, a 'i'm quitting because of the following'. and make it all professional and such. essentially creative differences. haha
     
  5. Bug-Rex

    Bug-Rex Active Member

    No, I won't give you $5,000,000.00.
     
  6. oneiguy

    oneiguy Active Member

    Good luck
     
  7. BKiller

    BKiller Active Member

    I don't know the situation but that was a great list!
     
  8. FTZ

    FTZ ^.^

    Get out while you still can. It is a sinking ship and the owners/investors will be out of business soon.
     
  9. Jake

    Jake Active Member

    yeah honestly, i think they will do anything to keep the doors open on the bowling alley, including shutting the restaurant down.

    the list, like i said. are all TRUE. I sent in my resignation letter this morning.
     
  10. superdoughboy4

    superdoughboy4 Active Member

    Yeah. It seems like you're making a good choice. And it sounds like that place is bound to fail, so might as well leave now rather than wait until it actually happens, while you're still "employed" there.
    Bad management is always the reason why places like this are the way they are.
     
  11. Trey

    Trey Active Member

    You lost me at #2. :p

    I eat food...I drink beer. I bowl...I drink beer. Watch Sports....yep more beer.

    That place will close before you know it! The owners are morons IMO.
     

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